Posted in life, love

Who’s Raising You?

Ok, first I want to start off by saying  I am not a “nosy” nor am I an “helicopter parent”, however, I do believe in “paying attention”. Now, by definition, my actions does not fit the bill.  Now that I have gotten that out way…

Recently I was chilling, doing what I do best, when I happened upon a conversation (because I was minding my business) that my sun was having with a young lady. Normally, it’s not within my auditory confines to listen to his conversations, but this time it was different. 

As I sat up, straighter, in my bed,  I constantly heard his side of what was a one sided conversation. At least from my standpoint…

Him: What you mean?

Him: So what you trying to say?

Him: So you saying I’m like all the other guys? 

Him: My name is __ don’t categorize me.

Him: You keep doing it, I’m not like them. 

Keep in mind I’m only hearing one side of the conversation. In doing so, I was so disheartened. Why you may ask? Well, let’s set the scene, you have two teens, ages 15-17 yrs of age trying to PROVE to one another their worth and reason for lack of trust from the other party. Sad state of affairs if you ask me.

Here I am a grown woman of age, *clears throat* 39 years old to be exact, and this conversation is reminiscent of conversations of old between self and my sista girl groups. Hearing this kid repeatedly attempt to soothe this young lady over to believe that he was “not like the others”, had me wondering at 15-17 yrs of age, who has let you down? Who’s raising you? 
At such a sweet, tender age of teen anything, what have you experienced that makes you not trust a kid, because they are KIDS, your age? Grant it, there’s a slew of things that may trigger the lack of trust in humanity, but I’ll start with the home on this one.
Often times, what one sees/hears within the home becomes the bible belt of their ways, until they learn to relearn for themselves. I’ve sat amongst many women with the “these men ain’t shyt” mentality. While doing so I have shared, because lawd knows I have some stories, but I do not subscribe to it. How can you when you continue to lie and/or allow them to lie in your/their bed?! Why do women choose to push the negative epitome, yet say they want a positive ending? (Men do it too, but in THIS intance I’m speaking from a woman’s perspective, mine.) When does one revere positivity and love as one? Seemingly it doesn’t start until “that one” piques your interest and you attempt to start anew until your next disappointment then it’s back to the hate.
Young women are unfortunately being raised with the same mentality of their “I wish I met you before you were hurt” mothers.  Stop spewing such negativity into the ears and onto the minds of girls who have yet to experience life, in its fullness. Unfortunately, we emulate what we see or hear most often. Good, bad or indifferent. Change the narrative, change the outcome. Allow them and yourself to love, freely, those deserving of it, without walls. Will you be disappointed, let down, angered by, the opposite sex somewhere/somehow along the way? Certainly! Must you live there? Most certainly not! 
My hope for the future is that we “change the people, in order to change the people.” I hope to not stumble upon another conversation of someone attempting to prove themselves because someone can’t see their value or worth . If so, cash me out, in totality, go where the appraisal is plentiful and never depreciates or if so, slowly. That’s when you understand and see your value, when it’s removed from the deprecation elements. There’s enough hate in today’s climate of the world. Don’t allow it to start in your home. Change the trajectory of your lifestyle and environment by changing the mindset. It’s not hard to see the forest through the trees when resolution is placed in your pathway. Be the change you want to see, adjust the frame.

Advertisements
Posted in Uncategorized

36 Years, 1 Day and A Wake Up

I have been living thirty six years, one day and a wake up on this earth as of today. (Everyone say HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY LetHerTellIt) Days have been crossed off the calendar like a inmate waiting to be set free.

image

Matter of fact, the “one day and a wake up” metaphor is actually used by inmates to countdown their release from confinement. This is how I have begun to view my way of living as “one day and a wake up”. This symbolizes liberation, freedom,  and a new lease on life. Imagine being confined for years, unable to break free from bondage until your time has been satisfied as appointed by the judge upon your sentencing. 

image

Can you imagine this? I can, you know why? I have previously lived that life of bondage. My own  personal bondage within my mind of what I felt I could not do, because of a lack of preparation. Preparation of what it would look like if I was successful or a lack thereof.  Guess what? I’m out here living and shit, not fully in the way I would want but one less chain link than what I may have had beforehand. 

I have accepted that my “one day and a wake up” is meant to inspire others. Some in small ways, others on a much larger scale. Guess what? I’m prepared for whatever this may bring.  It has been stated that, “the rent you pay on earth is through serving others.” HE would have it no other way. So on my quest for liberation my “one day and a wakeup” would have meaning on a daily basis. Not because my feet touched the ground, but because I’m prepared to give freely with/from my heart. We are not guaranteed a “wakeup”, but while awake we are guaranteed a living, a life. What are you choosing to do with it? How will you impact others?

In my “one day and a wake up” I know that I have dreams that has not come into fruition as of yet. Dreams deferred yet never denied. I am beginning to live in such a way that when you look at me, you see a change, a positive change. I’m thankful for the ability to see each new day as such, a new day. What is done in this new day, solely depends on my vision of how I see each wakeup. Your “one day and a wakeup” should hold weight, not bondage, but positive weight. If you want to gain good weight and grow from the inside out, lift the weights of the world off of your shoulders and live. Live as if you are sentenced by the judge of the most high, and in this sentencing HE says reach back, reach across and reach up. When you reach back you’re helping your fellow man/woman. When reaching across you are sharing with you fellow man/woman. When reaching up you are asking for assistance from GOD.

image

Reach back, across, and up to grab onto whatever is needed to sustain you in your “one day and a wake up.” If you are dreaming while asleep or day dreaming while awake make it a reality and do not continue to to allow your dreams to be deferred.  There’s someone awaiting a reach back, across and up. Are you delaying yourself by denying what he has not denied you in your wake up? If so, break away from the bondage and do not let anyone or anything box you in. Until next time, “one day and a wakeup” later….LIVE!